For Your Consideration
Award me no Oscar,
Bedeck me no Grammy –
Your platitudes bore me,
Your clapping is clammy.
Nobels are for losers,
Don’t grovel and crawl –
Your Emmys are empty,
And Pulitzers pall.
So spare me your trinkets,
Your Tony or Bafta –
Just pay me with sales,
And reward me with laughter.
Pray, do not insult me
With Knighthoods and gongs –
If you wish to do honour,
Keep singing my songs.
Rhyming Couplets 