Pans & Panic

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Pans & Panic

        1.
If the sound of distant clatter
From the kitchen shakes you from your bed,
If the smell of bubbling pancake batter
Makes you fear the bread,
Or if the chirpy chatter
Of a TV chef fills you with dread,
Then shriek or slink, it doesn’t matter,
But just scatter to the shed….

        2.
If the sound of critics pishing,
Tutting, and poo-pooing, taking aim,
Or sneering as they’re strutting, swishing,
Choosing who to raise to fame,
Just sucks you of ambition,
That you’ll never beat them at their game –
Then don’t wait from the first edition,
Join a mission, change your name…

        3.
If you hear a distant cry
From the skirl of his pipes in piercing shrills,
If you hear his hooves come trotting by,
Or his bleating, braying trills,
If you glance his wool-caked thigh,
Or horns still bloody from his kills –
Then pant and scream that the end is nigh,
And run high for the hills…

Day 7 – Panic – #inktober #inktoberpoem #inktoberpoetry

Badland Barons

Film crew filming around a supported saguaro cactus in the desert
The AI managed to even make it look like it’s been inflated…

Badland Barons

Spaghetti Westerns filmed in Spain –
Was that because the cactus got there first ?
Invading through the dry terrain,
And perfect with some charros interspersed…
Alas, the only ones we see
Are squat and unromantic prickly pears –
Saguaros need a century
To even grow those cowboy arms of theirs.
Instead, they had to turn to fakes
For long-shots standing-in as Arizona –
Moving flats between the takes
To look more Tucson, look less Barcelona…
Were there not native spurges
That could act the part as extras on the set ?
Although, what now emerges
Is a weird, invasive hybrid – better yet !

Day 4 – Cactus – #inktober #inktoberpoem #inktoberpoetry

Miniatures

Godshill Model Village 1984 by Roy Hughes is licensed under CC-BY-SA 2.0

Miniatures

Model railways run in circles,
Through the days of steam,
All cobbled-streets and Northern quirk-ful,
In a Thirties dream –
A spotless, frozen neighbourhood,
Bedecked with tiny trees,
And terraces of balsa-wood,
And cardboard factories.
This world had vanished long before
These modellers were born,
But here, in H-O scale once more,
It’s elegantly worn.
They never show the modern world,
It seems – no urban sprawl.
Perhaps they take so long to build,
It sets their sights so small…?

Day 3 – Miniature – #inktober #inktoberpoem #inktoberpoetry

Frame-Fillers

Putting the AI into saint?

Frame-Fillers

What makes Mona Lisa smile ?
Well, some say it’s the genius
Of Leonardo’s toils –
That undefining dreaminess,
That soul bared free, that hallowed style,
Not me –
No, I say it’s the pigments in his oils
That manifests his guile.

And now that she’s been painted, see,
She’s micrometre points-of-colour –
Sometimes brighter, sometimes duller –
Quantified by RGB,
And shared by log and file.
Leonardo’s canvas is just that,
And not some holy relic –
Just a poplar panel, nothing more.

What matters is no artefact,
And art critics aren’t clerics,
And a gallery is not a sacred store,
With treasures by the pile.
No – it’s the image, not the paint,
That we must cherish like a saint,
And never leave to perish –
But the board is just wooden tile.

And though there’s some may be indignant,
We can print with oil and pigment
Perfect copies, big and small –
Let’s have a thousand-Lisa free-for-all !
I’d say she’s worth the while…
Her beauty should be on the move,
Beyond the Louvre, to ev’ry wall –
So anyone can recreate her smile.

Day 2 – Relic – #inktober #inktoberpoem #inktoberpoetry

Grounds for Divorce

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Grounds for Divorce

Highbury Stadium – once was the time
When the very mention meant Arsenal.
But you threw that away for some sponsor or other,
Your history’s turned to a farce, pal.
And White Hart Lane has hardly fared better,
And Goodison fell by the way –
Where next ?  Old Trafford or Stamford Bridge,
Where memories no longer play ?
I get it, you needed to move, to expand –
And you don’t give a fig for the past.
You’d even let wither the name of the club
For a chequebook sufficiently vast.
Yet imagine Milan, but without the San Siro,
Or Barça decamped from the Nou.
And imagine your shiny new ground with an old name,
To carry your heritage through.

Home Kits

99 Football Shirts by Dreamstime

Home Kits

There’s far too many teams in red,
(And those that aren’t are blue instead) –
With some in stripes, a hoop or two,
Between the red (or else the blue).
And some are claret, some are sky –
But few will use a diff’rent dye.

So we look ourselves at home –
Yet on the road, we shed our skin.
And the fans will wear our latest polychrome
With a loyal grin –
Any colour, just so long we win.

But here and there, a yellow lurks,
Or gleaming white, which also works,
Or sometimes green, or sometimes gold,
(Or even pink, if feeling bold).
Now black’s a pretty unseen beast
As that’s the ref (or was, at least).

We may look odd away, for sure –
Yet when at home, we bear our crest,
Just like we’ve done a century or more
Upon our chest –
We don the colours that bring out our best.

Hard-Wrung

Kaitlin by Leslie Nichols

Hard-Wrung

The moment when the words come out,
That’s when my writing’s at its worst –
The struggling, spurting, roundabout,
The inspiration and the doubt,
As bubbles rise and burst.
The dread of what comes next,
There’s always next,
There’s always more to say –
The need to fill the page with text,
While my subconscious nags away.
So what do I take fright in,
Ev’ry sentence, ev’ry crumb ?
The grimmest part of writing
Is the endless writing yet to come.

The moment when the work is done,
That’s when my writing’s at its best –
At last I get to see the Sun,
And finally it feels like fun,
Now all that’s off my chest.
Of sure, there’s still the typos,
Always typos,
But they’re such a breeze –
I love to sit and smite those,
One-by-one, with such an offhand ease.
So what do I delight in,
Ev’ry sentence, ev’ry rhyme ?
The greatest part of writing
Is the having-written, ev’ry time.

Odd Is He

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Odd Is He

Odysseus – more smarts than wrath –
A narcissist and psychopath,
Who slays and shags his way back home.
A hero ?  That’s a laugh !

He uses people for his ends,
He needs no confidants or friends –
They’re deadweights over which he’ll roam,
Wherever fortune wends.

You won’t catch him confessing,
And he never learns his lesson,
And he never shows the least regret –
But still the gods keep blessing.

And yet the latest versions show
A man of honour, full of woe –
But better this than Homer’s vet –
That ancient bully ?  Let him go…

Candlelight Romance

Portrait of a Scholar in his Study by anon

Candlelight Romance

Rhea transits Saturn in the Sun of the Enlightenment,
Where gentlemen take note of nature’s law –
A lecture is attended by the lovers and the children
While a cockatiel is gasping out in awe.
The Moon picks-out the industry that sculpts the new environment
As Lunar Men are studying the bronze.
And ingots glow on Progress and on all the craft she’s skilled-in
In academies and clockwork pantheons.

Corten Steel

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Corten Steel

Our bridges are rusty before they are even open,
Clad in their ugliness –
They’re streaked and they’re stained with their spreadsheeted arrogance,
Shrugging with couldn’t-care-less.
So Brutalism continues its groping
In withered and leery undress,
With its surfaces tarnished and slumming advanced,
As it flakes and exudes under stress.

They really don’t look very sturdy to cope,
Whatever their builders declare –
With their rough-shod matt-faced blunt expanse
Whose corrosion hangs in the air.
They will fail.  But not because of their scope,
But because of the vision they share –
For the mind that puts rust over art and romance
Will decide obsolescence is fair.