Zip-Zap
Zipporah Zapata is a-buzz with chitty-chatter
As she busy-boozy blazes the bazaar –
Fizzing with a zealous zest, azure of gaze and Zara-dressed,
She jazzes with the zebras at the bar.
She’s such a zumba zoomer, as she dazzles with good humour,
As she blitzes with her zither on the breeze –
And when she wants to zero-in, and cozy-up with hazy gin,
She zones-out in a zen to catch some zees…
Day 26 – Zip – #inktober #inktoberpoem #inktoberpoetry
Gear-Slip
My mental spark has blown a fuse,
My neural net is down –
My binary just cannot choose,
My thoughts have all left town,
I just can’t cotton-on my loom –
Now…why did I come in this room…?
My lights are on, at half-a-watt,
But no-one’s in my head –
My memory is quite forgot,
My reckoning is dead.
My vanity is all in vain –
Now…what was I about again…?
My staying power’s called it quits,
My flow is far too dense –
My balanced humours lost their wits,
My common makes no sense
My confidence is all a con –
Now…where’s have all my marbles gone…?
Day 19 – Confused – #inktober #inktoberpoem #inktoberpoetry
Geegaws
A dingus is an oddity,
A thingamy commodity,
A doodad is a doohickey
With gubbins from a Buick, see ?
Now, whats-ma-jigs and thing-ma-bobs
Are diff’rent tools for diff’rent jobs,
While gadgets are a gizmo-gimmick
That the widget-jiggers mimic.
All are just appliances
To gussy-up contrivances,
And driving users to distractions –
Putting traps into contraptions.
Day 17 – Contraption – #inktober #inktoberpoem #inktoberpoetry
Basketball Bandits
Beware the hoodlums of the hoops,
The hard-men of the hardwood court –
The nasty north-of-six-foot troops,
The skinny, spindly, spivs of sport.
Beware the squad of Mr Big,
Their suits are pints, their arms are quarts –
But best not call these tallboys ‘twigs’,
Cos brass-nux make it hard to snort.
Beware the squeaky-footed joints,
Where shooters and their crews cavort –
They’ll use your head to score three-points,
And dunk your carcass in the port.
Beware the grizzly Gangly Gang,
Whose reach is long, whose limbs distort –
The Longshanks Lads they couldn’t hang
(Because the gallows are too short).
Day 16 – Gangly – #inktober #inktoberpoem #inktoberpoetry
Patience
The trick to a house of cards
Is to plan-out ev’ry row –
The kings and tens have far more ink,
So keep those high-ones low.
And rise on up to aces,
As we keep our breathing slow –
And pray the god of sudden draughts
Has somewhere else to go…
To think, we could have cut and dealt,
To share a hand of gin –
Instead, we’re busy propping-up
On edges far too thin.
If we can place this joker
Then we’re surely gonna win –
Just pray the god of friction
Has some stubble on his chin…
Day 13 – Flimsy – #inktober #inktoberpoem #inktoberpoetry
Pans & Panic
1.
If the sound of distant clatter
From the kitchen shakes you from your bed,
If the smell of bubbling pancake batter
Makes you fear the bread,
Or if the chirpy chatter
Of a TV chef fills you with dread,
Then shriek or slink, it doesn’t matter,
But just scatter to the shed….
2.
If the sound of critics pishing,
Tutting, and poo-pooing, taking aim,
Or sneering as they’re strutting, swishing,
Choosing who to raise to fame,
Just sucks you of ambition,
That you’ll never beat them at their game –
Then don’t wait from the first edition,
Join a mission, change your name…
3.
If you hear a distant cry
From the skirl of his pipes in piercing shrills,
If you hear his hooves come trotting by,
Or his bleating, braying trills,
If you glance his wool-caked thigh,
Or horns still bloody from his kills –
Then pant and scream that the end is nigh,
And run high for the hills…
Day 7 – Panic – #inktober #inktoberpoem #inktoberpoetry
Ogres
Oh god, is that an OG ogre,
Croaking broken brogue ?
Or else a voguish Mini-Mooger,
Ogling hokey rogues ?
Oh, show me no attention,
I’m just goading Mr Block –
With a token of nonsension,
Till a notion comes to knock…
Okay, I’m only joking,
With the bogeymen and blokes –
Just smoking hoagies like old fogies,
Colloguing a hoax.
I’m groping oafishly, to choke
A spoken ode on ogre-folk.
My mind, though, won’t let go of ‘O’,
For all the pogues I poke…
Day 6 – Ogre – #inktober #inktoberpoem #inktoberpoetry
Duff Said
This verse is not a winner,
That you really should ignore –
It’s a heading-for-the-bin-er,
Or a shoved-into-a-drawer.
This poetry is not your friend,
It’s smug and anodyne –
I really would not recommend
You read another line.
This verse is just a filler,
That you really should reject –
It’s a lacking-basic-skill-er
Or a flowery-unchecked
This poetry is all a lie –
This flim-flam’s such a flop –
I’m writing it, and even I
Am begging it to stop…
Kafé Wiënna
I saw a trendy cafe, with nothing but delicacies on show – so I checked them out, and took a seat, so that I could practice my German when I paid. I ordered a piece of cake, but it never arrived, to my cost. It seems, my earnest order was at once lost in translation…
Ich sah ein angesagtes Kaffeehaus, mit lauter Delikatessen ausgestellt – also checkte ich sie und setzte mich hin, um Deutsch gut zu üben, während ich zahlte. Ich bestellte mir ein Stück Kuchen, doch bei mir kam nichts an, auf meine eigenen Kosten. Es scheint, meine aufwendige Bestellung ging auf einmal in der Übersetzung verloren…
I saw a trendy Coffee-Haus,
With loud delicious-eatings out-displayed –
So checked I them and placed me down,
To German good to practice, as I paid.
I ordered me a chunk o’cake,
But at me came not at, on my own cost.
It gleams, my busy order went
On one-once in the meta-setting lost…
Incase you’re wondering – the umlaut in the title isn’t an umlaut, it’s a diëresis…
Asterichthys
A sunfish may look like a sun,
And a starfish like a star –
But both are fake, for the only one that’s real –
The starriest fish by far –
Is not some Milky Way-long eel,
But Cetus – the stellar monster gar –
He’s bigger than Cancer, older than Pisces,
Swimming the span of the sky high seas.
