Ev’ry Winner gets a Free Shave

shave

 

Ev’ry Winner gets a Free Shave

            (after Herblock)

To ev’ry newly elected member,
Let me spruce you up for the Chamber !
To all of you who stood against
The very things I’m fighting for,
To all the new MPs who dream
Of showing immigrants the door,
To all the laws to squeeze the poor,
And all the shills of gutter press,
To all the friends of oil and banks,
And those who got us in this mess,
To all the demagogues of wars:
For all of that, this day is yours.

So step right up !  Come one, come all !
Majorities both great and small !
You sir !  The new-crownded minister !
I see the campaign’s left its mark –
You’re looking rather sinister
With pallor grey and stubble dark.
I’ll take a razor to your chin
And even-out your crooked grin,
And give no cause for dread
As I draw my blade across your throat,
Of a single fleck of red –
For my razor, sir, is not my vote.
So even if you’re not my choice,
You’re still my fellow voters’ voice,
When tallied, said and done.
So go on, sport your freshened face
And show us how to run the place –
This shave’s on me, old son !
But just the one…

 

 

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s