Pride & Prejudice & Zombies
Through the village of Longbourn, the undead shuffle,
The unemployed and the destitutes.
The Luddites who moan in a rustic muffle,
Back from Napoleon without any boots.
Mr Bennett says he can’t even hear them,
So alien is his world to theirs,
But they’re getting restless, threatening mayhem –
What if it spreads to the staff downstairs ?
Don’t worry, Lizzie, here’s bold Mr Darcy
With wealth that’s been stripped from the backs of the poor,
He knows how to whip should the rabble gets arsey,
And put them back down when they dare ask for more.
Crush all their groups, and deport the whole crew,
This seething horde of the unwashed masses.
Best wipe them all out like befell Peterloo –
Or the balls overrun with these jumped-up lasses.
When not ignoring the cruelty of the upper classes, Jane Austen liked to describe them at leisure over here.
Rhyming Couplets 
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