I’ve always been an early adopter,
Picking-up the latest cold or spot,
Then spreading it round by helicopter
To fam’ly and colleagues, the whole poor lot.
Always running ahead of the doctor,
Bringing the buzz – if they want it or not.
And just when the viral trend infects –
That’s so last month, I’m on to the next.
Ev’rybody blames me for giving them hives,
For breaching their unhip sterile zone.
The slightest sniffle and out come the knives,
But it ain’t my fault they’re frightened and alone –
If they only led more varied lives
They’d catch some int’resting strains of their own.
Sure, this world is dirty and rife,
But nobody’s ever immune to life.
I should point out that I wrote this piece years ago, and as the third line says it is talking about colds and such and nothing worse…